Why does the word manipulator have to most people a negative response?
What does the word mean to you? Controlling? Abusive? Not a nice person!
Manipulator – the meaning shown in the various dictionaries are using the above words. Also “to gain an advantage etc”
Of course this brings us to another question… Who decided the meaning?
Is it not that every one of us is a manipulator?
From being born when we first start crying are we not trying to manipulate to gain what we need whether it be attention, food or be cleaned?
When we get up in the morning and shower, dress and for the ladies (maybe some men) put makeup on – are we not looking to manipulate the events of that day to our advantage?
Or work – when the boss comes into your office and asks for your opinion over a particular subject do you not “hand on heart” consider the question from your viewpoint which in most cases will lead the thoughts of the boss toward seeing the issue from your shoes/viewpoint? Meaning that you may have manipulated him?
Of course are any of the above examples wrong to do so?
Manipulation – when used correctly can be extremely positive. Over my years in selling (OMG selling – another word not liked by many) I have become a very good manipulator and proud of it. Anyone who is able to encourage, cajole, direct others to make positive decisions in their life is helping the process toward the correct outcome for that person.
Is manipulation a way of control? Perhaps, but again is it not also a way of allowing others thoughts to be channeled in a way that leads them to a decision for the best?
Think about it another way….
A doctor who knows that you need to stop smoking to allow you to possibly live longer and with less health problems will extol the virtues of not smoking. He will give you all the extremes of what damage it may cause you (if he doesn’t he should be!). Ten years later will you not, after watching maybe your friend or another family member die of cancer be thanking that manipulative doctor? I wonder if you have kids how they would thank him!
So are you a manipulator? More importantly would you like to become a great one that can help yourself and others create a wonderful lifestyle?